The moment I saw the press images of The Realm Draken Dildo and Drago Sword Handle, I was determined to get my grubby little hands on it. After more than a decade collecting sex toys, ordinary dildos don’t thrill me the way they once did. My jaded vagina needs a little pizzazz. Fortunately, the wildly fanciful new offerings from The Realm are downright exciting. I don’t have anything in my collection like them. So when Peepshow Toys generously offered me the chance to review The Realm Draken Dragon Dildo with Sword Handle Bundle, it felt kismet. That bronze sword and regal blue dong were destined to be mine.
Overview
Just in time for the final season of Game of Thrones, The folks at Blush Novelties have brought us a whole new line, The Realm, as an impish tribute. Why not add some cheeky roleplay to your Sunday night Game of Thrones ritual? Now I’m not saying that threw on a velvet cape, played the Game of Thrones theme song, engaged in some imaginary swordplay, and then fucked myself with said sword. But I’m not saying I didn’t do that. The collection includes the Drago Lock-On Dragon Sword Handle, the blue Draken Lock-On silicone dildo, and three different realistic Lock-On silicone dildos (one of which is currently offered at Peepshow Toys). You can purchase them separately or as bundles with a Drago Handle and one dildo.
The realistic dildos are offered in a single flesh tone that’s neither light nor dark. I suppose the manufacturer decided that it wasn’t in their interest to release the dildo in a variety of flesh-tones so they had to release just one. In a market awash in realistic dildos favoring white skin, it was a smart choice to release the Lock-On dildos in something other than the lightest of skin tones.
The collection utilizes what The Realm is calling a “Lock-On” connection system. It’s a Vac-U-Lock compatible system, although they don’t call it that, presumably because Vac-U-Lock is a trademark of sex toy manufacturer Doc Johnson. The choice to use the Lock-On system means that you should be able to attach any Vac-U-Lock compatible dildo in your collection to the handle, making it more versatile. Be sure to apply water-based lube to the Lock-On connection before connecting them so that you’ll be able to get them apart when you’re done.
In Use
In use, the Drago handle is genuinely practical. It’s easier to grip than the base of a dildo alone. I’ve been talking quite a bit to others in the industry about the utility of dildo handles so it’s great to finally have one. A dildo handle can be a godsend to those with mobility issues, limited dexterity, or a big belly to maneuver around. If you’re using a dildo with a partner, the handle offers an alternative to strap-ons or the cumbersome nature of manually fucking someone with a dildo.
The handle is not without complications, though. The dragon heads on either side of the handle look amazing but they’re just a bit sharp. I wish they had been smoothed in the manufacturing process in a way that made them appear sharp and fearsome but feel less pokey to the touch. The handle also has an apparent seam from casting the plastic. It doesn’t bother me too much but it makes the product seem less premium, especially considering the sword’s $79.99 premium price. I think it’s worth the price for the novelty but the execution leaves something to be desired.
NOTE: The Drago handle that I received initially had an issue with faulty (peeling) paint. Blush Novelties replaced the defective product with one that didn’t have the issue. They’re aware of this potential paint defect and are actively working to resolve the problem.
The Draken Dildo included in this bundle is a royal blue fantasy-style dildo. It’s 7.75 inches in length (7.5 inches insertable). In terms of girth, Draken is a generous 2 inches in diameter. Curiously, all of the available dildos in this collection are about 2 inches in diameter. I would like to see The Realm add a smaller, more average-sized dildo to this line as 2 inches in diameter is a challenge for many, including this reviewer. With considerable warm-up, I could make the dildo work for me, but I had to use toys from another manufacturer to get there.
What stands out to me the most about the Draken Lock-On Dildo is the extreme amount of texture. I don’t have a dildo as highly textured as this one. From big bumps to tiny crevices, I’ve never seen anything like it. You may even need a soft toothbrush to thoroughly clean those tiny crevices. Fortunately, the dildo isn’t rock hard so the texture isn’t as aggressive as it would feel with firmer silicone. Because of all of that texture and considerable girth, I wish Draken was made of squishy silicone. Something similar to the malleable outer layer of Blush Novelties’ Real Nude line would have made the Draken’s texture feel luscious. If you’re a textured-dildo devotee, run, don’t walk, to pick up this dildo. But for my own preferences, squishier would have been dishier.
Pros
- High-quality silicone
- A novel and imaginative product for the mass market
- Lock-On system is very versatile
Cons
- Potential paint issue
- Somewhat sharp edges and obvious seam
The Same Questions We Always Ask
- Manufacturer? The Realm by Blush Novelties
- Material? 100% Platinum Silicone
- Price? $99 for the Drago/Draken Bundle
- Body-Safe? Yes
- Dimensions? Max diameter: Diameter: 2” x Length: 7.75”; 7.5” Insertable
- Color: Handle- Bronze, Dildo- Blue
- Anal-Safe (does it have a flared base)? Yes
- Suggested Use? Vaginal, Anal, or Oral
- O-ring Compatible? Yes, but untested by me
- Vac-u-lock Compatible? Yes
- Lube? Use plenty of water-based lube
- Ease of cleaning? Easy Peasy. As with other silicone dildos, wash with soap and water before and after each use. To disinfect: wash with soap and water, rinse and follow using a 10% bleach solution with one-minute contact time. Rinse. Alternatively, wash with soap and water, then boil for 3 to 5 minutes.
Final Thoughts
I’m going to treasure my dildo sword and I’m grateful to Peepshow Toys for letting me review it. It’s not perfect but it’s worth it. If you love fantasy fiction and The Realm Drago and Draken appeal to you, get them! If you adore the novelty of these items, add them to your collection! If you’re ready for some Game of Throne roleplay, what are you even waiting for?
The Realm Dildo Sword (along with its coordinating dildos) really does offer something more than ordinary dildos. Will it get you off? Sure, but The Realm also gives you permission to play. I don’t mean “play” in the way that we usually mean when we talk about sex like “roleplay” or “ass play”. I’m talking about light-hearted fun and frivolity. A toy as patently absurd as a medieval sword with a dildo tacked on the end allows the user to let go and be silly. And that’s wonderful. If you’ve lost the joy of laughter in your sexual life (or perhaps never had it), The Realm Drago and Draken will bring it back.
FTC: Disclosure: this post contains affiliate links which support this site at no additional cost to you. I received this product in exchange for an honest review.
