I know that a straight guy may find it hard to believe that you could get some really cool Christmas toys for your guy friends on a sex toy, but it’s true! Seriously!!
The cool thing about buying your buds gifts from an adult site is that they’re packed with all kinds of adult novelties which means uncensored, dirty, disgusting, and hilarious gifts. Throw in one or two that encourage drinking and not only have you got an awesome present for your friend but you’ll benefit from it too – just have your camera ready cuz’ the opportunity to get some blackmail pics for later is HIGH if there’s enough beer involved.
I’ve taken it upon myself to find the most awesome gifts for your guy friends EVER. They’re all inexpensive and sure to get a few good laughs. Will they get your pal laid? Some of them just might, but you’ll have to skim the list to see…
Adrie’s Picks for the Most Effin’ Hilarious Gifts for Your Guy Friends
Wondering what makes me such an expert on what your straight guy friends will like? It’s a combination of things: being raised in a house with two brothers, a super macho dad and a grandfather with awesome senses of humor, and jobs spent working closely with men and being just foul-mouthed enough that they never felt the need to censor themselves just cuz’ there was a “lady present”. Add to that thousands of hours logged watching porn and the fact that I have the sense of humor of a frat boy or sailor, and I’d say I’m a fucken pro at what straight guys will find hilarious. Now, here are my suggestions:
Inflatable Talking Sheep: Tell me your buddies wouldn’t die laughing after receiving and inflatable sex sheep for Christmas! It’s got a strategically placed hole and action-activated sound! Just think of the gestures you could use to get that thing baaing and your friends on the floor in tears of laughter!
Boobie Dodge Ball: Did your friend love the movie Dodge Ball with Vince Vaughan and Ben Stiller? Of course he did – that’s some hilarious shit! I’m guessing that same friend loves tits or at the very least finds them amusing, right? Then you really can’t go wrong with this very inexpensive boob-shaped dodge ball. Think of the endless hours of enjoyment he’ll have playing with it and you’ll have whipping it at him! Classic.
Boobie Water Gun: Is it a little juvenile? Hell ya! But funny nonetheless! Pick up a few of these for your next party and go nuts cuz’ there’s nothing funnier than a bunch of grown men ducking behind furniture and rolling all Starsky and Hutch-style across the room trying to get away from the spray of a boob-shaped water gun!
Merry Fucking Christmas Candy: Nothing says you care like a box of Merry Fucking Christmas Candy. Great for satisfying the munchies too. *wink*
1000 Drinking Games: Just add a case of beer or a bottle of JD and he’ll be your buddy for life.
Batman XXX – A Porn Parody: Guys love Batman and they love porn. ‘Nuff said.
A Hairy Pussy: Just in case the sheep isn’t his thing or if he’s been going through a bit of a dry spell, this Penthouse Hairy Pussy Anniversary Edition is pocket sized and funny enough to give as a gag gift but realistic enough that he can use it if he wants to. And it’s by Penthouse, so you know you’re getting your pal the Cadillac of pocket pussies! You are a GREAT friend!!
Now go drink beer, scratch your balls and so a little shopping for the guys!
